But, God

Saul Fails and Is Rejected

Read 1 Samuel 15:17-23

Reflection: But, Lord

1. How is “But, Lord” a phrase that creeps into your vocabulary?
2. In what way have you tweaked God’s instructions to suit your convenience?
3. What are some practical ways you can turn from temptation in your life? Make a commitment today to take whatever steps you must to obey God with no ifs, ands or buts.

I recently started a journey of self-improvement. The goal was to make me a better me for my family in the long run. In the past, I have begun this same journey only to beat myself up somewhere along the way and turn back to where I was coming from. I am learning that these big decisions take courage and perseverance. I am that one who has had to pay the price for all of the times I have said but, God. The cumulative toll that these buts have taken on my health and my life have not always been good. I know that where I am now is a result of the times that I turned away from what God was telling me to do. I returned like Saul with a job half-done and God has let me know time and time again that this is not what he wanted. Anyone who has known me for any length of time knows that I love to write and that I have volumes of poems, stories and even a novel on the shelf. For years I have been told that I have a gift of writing. I have always said thank you but am still hesitant to share that part of me with others. I am constantly telling others that if they have a God-given talent and don’t share it with the world, they are not following the will of God. But why can’t I seem to take my own advice? I have made excuse after excuse; I don’t have time, my writing is not that interesting, it’s not really as good as they say. The buts go on and on. If I could count how many fitness programs that I have started only to stop before I could see any real results, I’m sure they would number in the hundreds. The constant choice of what tastes good or feels good for the moment over what I know will benefit me best in the long run has led to some unexpected health concerns. All because I said but, God…one more won’t hurt-It’s not the one that gets you but the two and the three. It’s okay if I don’t exercise today-The one day doesn’t hurt, but when the days turn to weeks and years, damage is done. I recently started an exercise program that involves my family. We work out together two days a week and then I work out two days a week by myself. I recently watched a video by Bishop T.D. Jakes where he talked about the importance of commitment . This video had a powerful influence on me.

Today I acknowledge that I have been a but, God person, doing things that are convenient for me but costly in my walk with God. I also acknowledge that that’s Okay…sometimes, but God rewards obedience and in order to receive the FULL blessing of God, I have to stop beating myself up in those moments, turn around and get right back on track rather than giving God my buts instead of my best.

Related Readings

Proverbs 4:20-27

Matthew 26:36-46

1 John 3:21-24 

This is a powerful word

Are You Listening?

The People Demand a King

Read 1 Samuel 8:1-22

Reflection: Are You Listening? 1 Samuel 3:10

1. What are some things that drown out God’s voice for you? What makes it difficult for you to be still in God’s presence?
2. Are personal sins blocking you from hearing God’s voice? Take time to confess any wrongs you have committed and ask God to cleanse you.
3. Read Psalm 84 to prepare you to spend some time in God’s Presence.

Life, Life is what keeps me from doing what I know I should for God. My noisy, busy life is in constant competition; always trying to get the floor. It seems that I am just too, too busy. First, I have to work, then the kids need me, my husband is next in line, and then if there is anything left, I will take some for myself. And then the phone rings; dishes need to be washed; laundry folded.  I recently took a vacation and stopped all of my data. I wanted to take a vacation. When I returned, I had ONE HUNDRED and NINETY emails, and that is just on one account. It seems that daily, the needs of those around me are more than I have time to give. It seems that everything and everyone needs me all at the same time. Maybe it’s just me, but I thought that technology and all of the modern inventions of industrialized society were supposed to make life easier. Instead, I am always bogged down and occasionally overwhelmed with all that I have to do in a day’s work. I promised the Lord that I was going to read DAILY for just thirty days, reflect DAILY and blog DAILY about my reflections. I must admit that it has been a challenge. I have been able to read and reflect, but many of the blogs remain in my head. I am trying to get them out. One thing that I have to do is stop beating myself up. I believe that God knows my heart. I did find encouragement in a passage that I read the other day. It simply said, “My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that I have that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road though I may not know about it. Therefore I will trust you always though I may seem lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and will never leave me to face my perils alone (Thomas Merton).”  I think this is the point of our busy lives. It is there to remind us of God’s grace. Even when we don’t keep our promises He is faithful and always in our presence, waiting patiently for us to return to his presence. When my busy life tries to drown out the voice of God, I just say the name Jesus (selah) and I know that he is with me.  And I have found that when I put Him first, the rest of the day seems much easier, and less busy. 

Related Readings:

Psalms 84: 1-12; 86:1-17

Matthew 5:8

John 10:1-6 

Deborah The Sabra

Cycles of Disobedience

Read Judges 2:10-19 and Judges 4-5

Reflection: Deborah The Sabra

1.   Who among your friends are most like the prickly pear cactus (tough on the outside but sweet on the inside)?
2.    In what ways are you sometimes sharp on the outside yet sweet on the inside?
3.  Spend some time praying that God would soften your edges. Pray for the friends in your life, asking God to strengthen them when necessary and sweeten them when needed.

This week’s reflection compares the name given to today’s Israelites to the prickly pear cactus, tough on the outside yet sweet on the inside. This analogy applies to so many people in my life, including me. I will not place the blame on any of my friends; many times I am the prickly pear. This gives me empathy for the times that they are difficult; I completely get it.  I had never really seen myself this way, but I have more and more lately uttered the words, "I have zero tolerance for....(fill in the blanks)".   It seems that today’s woman is tough skinned. We have to have that exterior that protects us in the work place. Many of us are driven to get ahead and in order to do that, we have developed this thick skin, this impenetrable outer layer that allows only our closest allies inside. It has become a means of survival in today’s world. I sometimes feel myself preparing for a meeting and getting all girded up because I know that I will have to present some defense. I am not defensive, just prepared for anything that may come my way. I know that I have to be better prepared and more efficient  than my counterparts. Maybe I am misguided, but in many ways, I have learned that this is what is expected and the “catch more flies with honey” analogy does not always fly in the workplace if you want to be taken seriously as a professional. This, coupled with my natural tendency toward introversion,  occasionally creates a barrier to me becoming close to people that I do not know. Sometimes in life, it is necessary to be the prickly pear, all the while maintaining that inner sweetness. I ask God to soften my edges, thorns and barbs when necessary, allowing some of the sweetness to seep out, and not allow me to bring my cactus skin home with me so that I can be a more loving wife, mother and friend.

Donnie McClurkin "Search Me, Lord"

Related Readings

Exodus 15:20-21

Isaiah 51:3

Ephesians 6:18 

Count The Ways

Obedience from Love: Read Deuteronomy 10: 12-13 and 11:13-21

“And now, O Israel, what does the Lord your God ask of you but to fear the Lord your God, to walk all his ways, to love him, to serve the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul, and to observe the Lord’s commands and decrees that I am giving you today for your own good?”

Reflection: Count the Ways

1. When was the last time you told God You love him?
2.    When was the last time you served another out of love for God?
3. Can you think of a benefit you've enjoyed because you obeyed a specific command of God?

This is really a tough one. When I read it, I paused because I know that obedience is my number one battle. Call me hard headed, stubborn, obstinate, persistent or whatever.  I do like to do things my way, but as you may know, that hasn’t worked well for me in the past.  It took me a few days to write this particular blog because it required more reflection and prayer. First of all, I try to tell the people that I love, including God, daily that they are the most important priorities in my life. That is the easy part. As far as my serving others, this is more of a challenge. I do work with the children at my church and this is surely fulfilling, but what I recall is the time that I worked with a ministry at my church called the “Sandwich Makers”. These ladies go out every weekend and feed the homeless in our community breakfast. They do not have a media truck following them; they provide the food; they don’t have an entourage of helpers. Just a handful of dedicated ladies, who give tirelessly of themselves. I took my family out one Sunday to help them feed a group at the shelter. This was one of the most touching days of service that I have experienced because it puts everything in perspective. The things that we take for granted, daily; a hot meal, is so appreciated by a group of adult men who are down on their luck. The benefits of this single act of obedience had a great impact on me and my family. My children had never seen a homeless person up close and had never correlated homelessness with hunger. I was able to empathize with the people there. I ran into someone whom I had known as a child. He grew up in a dysfunctional, fatherless family that was always one paycheck away from homelessness, and there he was, homeless himself. I was able to offer him a meal and words of encouragement that what he was going through at that time did not have to be a lifelong circumstance. I prayed for him and continue to do so and reminded him that even when his family had nothing, they still went to church and gave thanks to God for what he had brought them through. I believe that my act of obedience of accompanying the “Sandwich Makers” on that day, was God’s way of leading me to encourage someone who may have lost his hope and his faith.